


Like Bunnies that Like the Avengers

by completelyhopeless



Series: Coulson's pet 0-8-4 [5]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Crack, Gen, Humor, another bad name for an 0-8-4, coulson's pet 0-8-4
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-26
Updated: 2014-11-26
Packaged: 2018-02-27 03:12:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2676857
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/completelyhopeless/pseuds/completelyhopeless
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In addition to looking slightly like rabbits, the 0-8-4s apparently multiply like them. </p><p>The world might be ending. That's almost certain if they tell Romanoff about this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Like Bunnies that Like the Avengers

**Author's Note:**

> I owe [scribblemyname](http://archiveofourown.org/users/scribblemyname/pseuds/scribblemyname) for helping me pinpoint how Natasha would react. Her reaction isn't in this part, but it did make this step possible.

* * *

"How many of them are there?" Phil asked, ready to duck behind the cap's shield if May made a move. He figured that she'd be angry, but he had not known any of this was possible when he took Bucky in all those years ago.

"Current count is five. We're attempting to contain them, but it has been difficult. The one we assume is the mother gets angry when her babies are 'threatened,'" May answered.

"How do you know it's even a girl? The one we saw was just a ball of fur."

May gave the other man a suspicious look. Phil stepped in. "May, this is Sam Wilson. He worked with Captain America to take down H.Y.D.R.A."

May nodded, still on her guard. She turned and led them toward the lab. "Skye found a file that suggests H.Y.D.R.A. may have been responsible for imprisoning Bucky's mate."

"Not good. He's already pissed enough to have eaten a building I hope was H.Y.D.R.A."

"Can this thing be stopped?" Rogers asked. "And if so, how?"

"Bucky is _not_ a thing," May snapped.

"He's May's co-pilot," Phil warned. They did not want to risk her ire. He let out a breath. "I suppose I should have told you they call May 'the Cavalry.'"

Rogers nodded in appreciation. "Ma'am."

May gave him a stony look and said nothing, ushering them into the lab.

"I brought the captain with because I think he can help contain the situation."

She shook her head. "That won't work, Phil. Bucky may like Captain America, but his children don't."

"We tried that first, when we needed to try and calm down the mother," Simmons said, popping up next to them. She grimaced. "Unfortunately, that only seemed to anger her. She may have been fed false information by H.Y.D.R.A."

"No comics, then."

"No, sir. But Fitz and I were able to use other materials to calm most of them. Thor seems to like Norse myths."

 "Thor?" Captain America asked with a frown.

"Well, we were going to stick with what Agent Coulson started in naming them after Howling Commandos," Simmons explained, "but when they didn't like Captain America's comics, we tried some video footage, and when they saw the Avengers..."

"I see," Phil said. Then the implications of that statement hit him and he winced. "No. Tell me you did not name one Romanoff. Or Natasha."

"It was the only girl we'd found so far besides the mother," Fitz said, and Phil started to say something but stopped when he saw the bandage on the scientist's hand. "And it fits her, so we left it alone."

"This is not going to end well," Coulson said. "At least get rid of the bow. That might add a few seconds to your life."

"Chill, AC," Skye said. "You are way too tense right now."

"Bucky is loose and trying to eat everything H.Y.D.R.A. He also has children."

"And a mate," Fitz added less than helpfully. "She doesn't have a name yet."

"The destructive nature of these things is unlike anything we know of except perhaps the Hulk," Simmons began and then stopped to pick up one of the fur balls. "No, sweetheart. Not you. You're fine."

"You have to be kidding me," Captain Rogers said. "I was supposed to be finding Bucky, not a bunch of furry... things."

"You called them things."

Rogers whirled to try and apologize, but he stopped when he saw two more of Bucky's children in May's arms. She set one on the counter and gave it a dirty look. "That one is Stark."

"No one ask," Phil ordered. "No. One. Ask."

 

 


End file.
